Tomorrow, Tomorrow, I _____ You, Tomorrow.

I am not quite sure how to fill in this blank - "eagerly anticipate," "dread," "look forward to," "have no idea what to expect from," etc.

September 8, 2009, is the day I start my first real job as an attorney. And for those of you who have asked, there is no difference in the US between an attorney and a lawyer (I think attorneys like to be called attorneys because of all the "lawyer" jokes out there). Anyway, for some reasons, the Missouri firms and the bar examiners thought it would be fun to bring added stress to this new phase of life by establishing the potential for horrific humiliation in front of all our new colleagues on our first day of work. Because tomorrow, at 5pm, all the Missouri Bar candidates (including myself), will also find out if we passed the bar or not. After chaos ensues at about 4:58 pm, all the people whose name show up on the list on the Missouri Bar website will proceed to a happy hour. So of course I am left with the question - what if my name is not there.

So I wonder what tomorrow will be like - meeting a bunch of new people, taking our "professional photograph," listening to detailed instructions about how we will now be taxed at an insanely high level (thanks, Obama) - "so fill out your forms correctly," trying to obtain a rudimentary understanding of the complex phone system, beginning to practice seeing the world through six-minute increments, .... and then 5:00 will come.

Oh My.

What I Will Never Be

I had never bought a piece of furniture from a store...until yesterday, that is. After seemingly endless hours (over a period of several months) perusing craigslist for a matching couch-loveseat combo that didn't have stripes or flowers or smoke smell, and finding little, Paul and I ventured out to Nebraska Furniture Mart and bought our first piece of "store furniture" as we called it. Yes, corporate america, we have detoured from our dumpster-diving, garage sale-ing, Freecycling Selves, and have sold at least a small part of ourselves in support of you.

We decided, though, that we could save money by picking them up with our own truck and trailer, and avoid the 59 dollar delivery fee. Getting them loaded was no problem - the countless burly NFM employees who load furniture as a living swarmed our trailer and hoisted it and secured it like professionals (I guess they are). The peculiar sight, however, was my little self trying to stretch my arms (which don't stretch very far I learned) around our couch, which was wrapped in 1) cardboard 2) plastic padding 3) plastic wrap (check out the pic above to verify my story). Not only was my wingspan considerably insufficient for the project, but the plastic wrap provided a significant lack of traction for grip. But after 1/2 an hour of grunting and sweating and "stop, Paul, wait"-s, we got our new couches into our living room. The pics are of our hearth/living room - it was hard to get a good view becuase of the angle. But for what it's worth, here they are. And I just might love them.

And the fabulous thing about last night, of all of the hundreds of ways I could see myself spending my life, I have ruled out moving furniture. And for that I am grateful.

Yes, It's Here

My first blog of three months. I know, just believe it. You probably can't contain yourself right now. But lest my friends think I have forgotten them, I have returned to the world of blogging.

So much has happened in the past 3 months - life has been so crazy I couldn't breathe and is now calm and peaceful.

It started when we listed our house, expecting it to be difficult to sell, while I was studying for the bar and Paul was working. When we sold our house 6 hours later, we had not found a house and I had trouble getting away to look for houses. But Paul was fabulous (big surprise, I know) and house-shopped while I studied. Our friends were wonderful - I provided pizza and boxes and mid-bar ridiculous entertainment and they came and packed up our house.

We moved into a room that Paul set up at my parent's house. Within a week there, and after looking at 50-60 houses, we found our dream house. Ok, maybe that is a little bit of an exaggeration, but we LOVE IT HERE. It so much is "us." Hardwoods throughout kitchen and bathrooms re-done, walls knocked out to create an open feeling even though the ceilings are lower, a private backyard, a cozy sunroom, a fireplace with built-in shelves, I feel so undeserving!

A week after moving in to our house (which our friends and family also made possible. I don't know what we would have done without their help) I left for Jeff City, Mo, to take the bar. The 14 hours of testing was over before I knew it and I returned to live again. Studying for the bar was the hardest thing I think I have ever, ever done. It was hard to study so much each day knowing there was too much to learn and I could never, no matter how much I studied, "conquer" the material. I am SO thankful that is done, and hopefully I pass - I will find out one week from yesterday. If I take the KS bar in Feb, I am hoping it will be a lot less stressful!!!!!

So my recent weeks have included Table Rock Lake with the family (a lot of lake and pool fun!); a CO trip to see family and friends, which included lots of laughing; estate and garage sale-ing my little heart out to try to fill our house with goodness; "recipe-shopping" as Susan calls it; and time with family (now that we are close to them, we get to see them a lot more).

I turned 26 on Monday, and I want you to know that in honor of that big day, I decided it was time to become fashionable and so I chopped some bangs. I think I like but am still getting used to them. Pics to come. My sister's bday is two days after mine (today) and we celebrated together. Enclosed is a picture for your enjoyment.

Pure, Simple Joy.

The Children in my life bring me so much joy. Oh to have faith like a child. I love listening to laughter that comes from their very gut. And all you have to do is love, and you get loved back. We can all take a lesson.

John, James, Mary, and Grace made me a couple of graduation books at my graduation parties. They are pretty unbelievable!

James came to my graduation and was so patient during the long speeches. I love his laugh.

Baby Abby, we prayed for her for a long time. She is beautiful.

I love Madison, even though I have the suspicion she might love Paul a little more:) But really, Brooke has done such a good job with her - she is so smart and kind and loving.

Unbelievable!

I have often wondered what it is like to be in a torrential downpour. I didn't exactly know what those words mean. But a couple of days ago, when we got 4 inches of rain in 1.5 hours, I began to understand it a little bit better. The first two pics are of our front yard, street, and the yard and creek across the street. The last picture is our rice patty field. . . I mean our backyard.

Family Health Legal Services Clinic

This year I worked in a poverty legal clinic. It was one of the best experiences I have had in all of law school. The people I worked with were simply wonderful - so willing to help and patient when I screwed up and invested in helping me learn and in advocating for our clients. I did a lot of translation, worked a little bit on immigration (love it), managed protection from abuse cases, and wrote my first wills. The client contact was invaluable. Below are the pictures from our end of the year party. We missed you, Dana and Ellen!

Vera, you make me oh so very happy!

My beautiful friend, Ayesha.

The whole group of us

Me, Vera, Patricia (the best attorney-supervisor ever) and Julie

Us with our very dear Professor Gottlieb - you couldn't ask for better!

Forever and Always

Yesterday I finished law school forever and always.

I took a test and caught myself 3 times in 3 hours starting to think about how I was almost done - focusing was a slight issue :)

I then celebrated with party-planning, and then a sweet friend treated me to bubble tea at my favorite tea house in town - House of Cha.

By the way, I learned that when you put milk in black tea, the milk protiens bind up some of the anti-oxidants, so it isn't as healthy. That is sad because I love milk and splenda in my black tea. Apparently, some types of soy milk don't do that, so for all you anti-oxidant-lovers, you might think abou turning soy (I am thinking about it).

I feel free. Bar review starts May 20th, but I am not thinking about that yet. Until May 20, I am free as a bird and going to savor every moment.